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This made me lol.


Ben.

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So I'm riding downtown with my woman and this drunk ass redneck is pacing alongside us. He's very obviously staring at her and to a degree, it's irritating me. He tries to show out after we leave a redlight by flooring his POS Z71 and barely spinning the tires only AFTER he'd held down on the brakes for a minute.

 

We roll up to the next light, only we're flopped, I'm facing HIS truck rather than my woman.

 

I let him know, "Dude that was adorable, really it was."

 

He responds, "I got your adorable right here in my pants."

 

I respond, "Yea.. I was referring to that LITTLE burnout you just did..you know, how women say ADORABLE when they're talking about babies? Yea .. you have something little, cute and adorable in YOUR pants?"

 

My woman started to crack up. He turned off. It was teh lulz.

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Stupid people make me laugh.

 

I was at a big intersection the other night, and I was in the left lane waiting for the green arrow to turn.

 

Some guy pulls up next to me on my right, and is just staring at me. I don't know what he was in, but he revs his engine a little.

 

Then MY light turns green (as does the one across from me) to turn left. This guy is still just staring at me and he floors it (while his light is still red)

 

So the first car turning left on the other side BARELY gets by in front of him, and this guy goes right between the first two cars turning left in front of him.

 

I watched all this, laughed, and then turned.

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DUDE! That happened to me once when I was driving the EJ6 I used to have. Some dude in a 3000GT VR4 was like, bouncing off a 2-step waiting for the light to go forward to turn green. He saw the turn arrow go green and f*cking dumped. I lol'd.

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